Thread of Love

“You have changed a lot. You don’t show me the kind of love you had earlier” was her complaint recently. “Yes I don’t show you. But that doesn't mean I don’t love you.” I said to myself. I know, I am not showing her any affection recently. I am at war-a war waged inside me - a war between me and me.

We had a lovely life in the beginning. We started our life in a small house which had only one room. I love her more than anything and I did tell her that and showed it all the way possible. Money was a problem, but she was very understanding as is now. She never complained about anything, except not being with her. We spent hours together which in turn built our life in a strong foundation.

As soon as my work was over, I would be hurrying home. I could never buy anything for her though I wanted to. Love cannot buy everything, need money for that. But she never complained. To increase our joy our first baby came in. I was worried, very much worried though I did not show it. But I knew she knows everything. Our hearts had become one. So it was neither possible to cover up my heart from her nor hers from me. We had a strong thread of love uniting us.

We had quarrels. Though not very often, we would get angry and shout at each other. Even when we were at the highest point of anger we never used words to intentionally hurt the other. Because I knew I am not hurting her but myself, so did her. Every night we would talk, say sorry to each other if we quarreled and would hug and kiss each other before sleep.

My financial crisis shook my mind and I was most of the time worried calculating and thinking over and over. It took most space of my mind and I forgot to spent time with her sometimes even to talk to her. It was worrying me how to take care of the family with the little income I get as a driver. I always wanted to buy a car for myself, but never did.

I felt a warm hand on my forehead and I opened my eyes. “I am sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. I was angry with the children and I just poured it out on you. I didn't think it would hurt you this much. I am sorry. I am so sorry.” I looked at her and asked, “Do you know that I love you more than anything in this world?” She hugged me tightly and said, “I know I am the person whom you love most. But I would like to hear it often.” Our tears became one like our hearts. Our son came and hugged us both and there we went back to the small one-room-house in the beginning.

Love is not love if it is not expressed.

The thing called SELFISHNESS.

Do I work because I am so committed to my employer that I would do anything and everything for the betterment of my employer?
Has my employer hired me because he wants to help me earn my living and be happy or he wants more profit?

Do I take care of my children because they want me or I want them?

Do I do charity works or donate for the needy because they need me?

Do I live in this world because the world needs me?

Do I pray to God because He needs my prayers?

Do I buy my grocery because the grocery shop owner has no other means of income?

Selfishness is a word we often use to speak about those type of people who care nothing for others and look for their own benefits. But is there anybody who is not selfish at all? I personally doubt it. When I work, I work because I get the remuneration for it. When I do something for charity, I do it so that I get the praise from others about my generosity. If I do it secretly - as some of us might be doing, I get a satisfaction myself that I have done something for the needy and the gratitude and praise I have for myself cannot be expressed in words. I feel worthy of living. I feel proud that I understand my society. I feel I am able to see the needy and humane to help them.

I have children. I do everything to make sure they get the best. I feed them, cloth them, educate them etc. etc. Is it because they need me or I need them to love me, hug me, kiss me, call me dad and appreciate my sacrifices for them? I feel this is a mutual selfishness. I need them and so do they. I love them and so do they.

Every person do what they do because there is something which comes back to them. If not nobody would waste their time, energy, and money etc. for anything or anybody.

A Rainy Night In The Forest. Part-7

The best quality of a human being is that he will do anything and everything if he wants to ...

Then things moved fast. A few more joined us. Two drivers took a bundle of rope each, but they were too thin to use. One of us said he had seen a bundle of thick new plastic rope in a pickup behind the line. We went and asked him for it. The one who had noticed it did not know the pickup driver’s language and so I asked him for it. Though he was reluctant at first, we convinced him and bought it for the price he demanded. Two choppers were brought and started cutting the branches down. In about 30 minutes the tree was cut into two pieces. We tied the rope to each piece and pulled it to each side of the road with the help of a truck. As the tree was moved aside, I was the one to cross it first and go ahead. I was on a motorcycle at the front.  It was already 10 O’clock when I reached my office. As I explained the situation I was in I was spared form Loss of Payment.

We are all cooperative, sympathetic, innovative, motivating, etc human beings. But the pace, at which we move, is blinding us from all these beauties of life. Like a traveller in a fast train, we miss the beautiful flowers we pass through and look at the rocky hills at the distance. If we can take the stairs instead of lift, take a walk instead of our car, count the stars instead of our salary/profit, smile at a child instead of shouting at the subordinates, share food with a hungry instead of stuffing the fast food, we really LIVE OUR LIFE.

LIFE is ONLY ONCE.
It is to LIVE, not to watch it slipping away in the busy schedules we have created for ourselves.

HAPPY LIFE.

END.

A Rainy Night In The Forest. Part-6

“What do you want?” was a milder question than I expected.

“There is a tree fallen across the road in the middle of the forest.”

“Where exactly is it?” He asked again.

“It is near to the Hanuman Temple.”

“Where has the tree fallen from? Top or bottom? “

“It has fallen across the road.” I did not understand how the direction of the fall matters, but still I said, “It has fallen from bottom to top.”

“Then you have to inform the other office. It is their jurisdiction.” And he went in.

I felt foolish to trust the government offices. I turned and walked back to the tea shop.

“What did they tell?” They were curious. “They told to inform the other office.” Is what I said to them. “Can you inform them?” I asked the Maruthi vala.

“Yes I will.” He readily accepted. I walked to my motorcycle and started back to the scene at the middle of the forest.

They had started cutting down the tree when I reached them.

“Did you inform them? What did they tell you? Are they coming?” All were hopeful that help will be coming soon. Because they forgot they are in India.

“I don’t think they will be coming. They are blaming the responsibility on each other.”

“Oh God!” Exclaimed one. “Let us see what we can do.” came the voice of an optimist from the crowd.

(to be continued.)