The Parent in You

Children are the best investment one can have. But to make it worth investing, we need to invest the best and the most valuable thing we have i.e. TIME.

It is better to present your child a toy car for Rs.100/- and join him to play with it than gifting him a BMW and never bother even to see what he does with it.

Time is life. Giving your children your time means giving them your life and be sure you will get it back in hundred folds.

If your child is not able to play with you, not able to make mistakes, not allowed to experiment with his life, not able to learn new things-which you may feel unnecessary, not able to shout at you, not able to get an apology from you when you go wrong, never expect them back either now or in future.

Your child is a not you he/she has a different destiny. Support him/her to choose it and live his/her life. They will make mistakes-as they should. But appreciate their calibre to try new things. Guide them and be a mender for them. Never a policeman.

When your child knows even if he/she makes a mistake, you will be by his/her side, be sure they will ever be your side even after you are gone from this world.

I can’t be you, you can’t be me and we can’t be them. Understand it and accept them. Then you will experience that Heaven is Here and Now.

Thread of Love

“You have changed a lot. You don’t show me the kind of love you had earlier” was her complaint recently. “Yes I don’t show you. But that doesn't mean I don’t love you.” I said to myself. I know, I am not showing her any affection recently. I am at war-a war waged inside me - a war between me and me.

We had a lovely life in the beginning. We started our life in a small house which had only one room. I love her more than anything and I did tell her that and showed it all the way possible. Money was a problem, but she was very understanding as is now. She never complained about anything, except not being with her. We spent hours together which in turn built our life in a strong foundation.

As soon as my work was over, I would be hurrying home. I could never buy anything for her though I wanted to. Love cannot buy everything, need money for that. But she never complained. To increase our joy our first baby came in. I was worried, very much worried though I did not show it. But I knew she knows everything. Our hearts had become one. So it was neither possible to cover up my heart from her nor hers from me. We had a strong thread of love uniting us.

We had quarrels. Though not very often, we would get angry and shout at each other. Even when we were at the highest point of anger we never used words to intentionally hurt the other. Because I knew I am not hurting her but myself, so did her. Every night we would talk, say sorry to each other if we quarreled and would hug and kiss each other before sleep.

My financial crisis shook my mind and I was most of the time worried calculating and thinking over and over. It took most space of my mind and I forgot to spent time with her sometimes even to talk to her. It was worrying me how to take care of the family with the little income I get as a driver. I always wanted to buy a car for myself, but never did.

I felt a warm hand on my forehead and I opened my eyes. “I am sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. I was angry with the children and I just poured it out on you. I didn't think it would hurt you this much. I am sorry. I am so sorry.” I looked at her and asked, “Do you know that I love you more than anything in this world?” She hugged me tightly and said, “I know I am the person whom you love most. But I would like to hear it often.” Our tears became one like our hearts. Our son came and hugged us both and there we went back to the small one-room-house in the beginning.

Love is not love if it is not expressed.

The thing called SELFISHNESS.

Do I work because I am so committed to my employer that I would do anything and everything for the betterment of my employer?
Has my employer hired me because he wants to help me earn my living and be happy or he wants more profit?
Do I take care of my children because they want me or I want them?
Do I do charity works or donate for the needy because they need me?
Do I live in this world because the world needs me?
Do I pray to God because He needs my prayers?
Do I buy my grocery because the grocery shop owner has no other means of income?

Selfishness is a word we often use to speak about those type of people who care nothing for others and look for their own benefits. But is there anybody who is not selfish at all? I personally doubt it. When I work, I work because I get the remuneration for it. When I do something for charity, I do it so that I get the praise from others about my generosity. If I do it secretly - as some of us might be doing, I get a satisfaction myself that I have done something for the needy and the gratitude and praise I have for myself cannot be expressed in words. I feel worthy of living. I feel proud that I understand my society. I feel I am able to see the needy and humane to help them.

I have children. I do everything to make sure they get the best. I feed them, cloth them, educate them etc. etc. Is it because they need me or I need them to love me, hug me, kiss me, call me dad and appreciate my sacrifices for them? I feel this is a mutual selfishness. I need them and so do they. I love them and so do they.

Every person do what they do because there is something which comes back to them. If not nobody would waste their time, energy, and money etc. for anything or anybody.