Thread of Love

“You have changed a lot. You don’t show me the kind of love you had earlier” was her complaint recently. “Yes I don’t show you. But that doesn't mean I don’t love you.” I said to myself. I know, I am not showing her any affection recently. I am at war-a war waged inside me - a war between me and me.

We had a lovely life in the beginning. We started our life in a small house which had only one room. I love her more than anything and I did tell her that and showed it all the way possible. Money was a problem, but she was very understanding as is now. She never complained about anything, except not being with her. We spent hours together which in turn built our life in a strong foundation.

As soon as my work was over, I would be hurrying home. I could never buy anything for her though I wanted to. Love cannot buy everything, need money for that. But she never complained. To increase our joy our first baby came in. I was worried, very much worried though I did not show it. But I knew she knows everything. Our hearts had become one. So it was neither possible to cover up my heart from her nor hers from me. We had a strong thread of love uniting us.

We had quarrels. Though not very often, we would get angry and shout at each other. Even when we were at the highest point of anger we never used words to intentionally hurt the other. Because I knew I am not hurting her but myself, so did her. Every night we would talk, say sorry to each other if we quarreled and would hug and kiss each other before sleep.

My financial crisis shook my mind and I was most of the time worried calculating and thinking over and over. It took most space of my mind and I forgot to spent time with her sometimes even to talk to her. It was worrying me how to take care of the family with the little income I get as a driver. I always wanted to buy a car for myself, but never did.

I felt a warm hand on my forehead and I opened my eyes. “I am sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. I was angry with the children and I just poured it out on you. I didn't think it would hurt you this much. I am sorry. I am so sorry.” I looked at her and asked, “Do you know that I love you more than anything in this world?” She hugged me tightly and said, “I know I am the person whom you love most. But I would like to hear it often.” Our tears became one like our hearts. Our son came and hugged us both and there we went back to the small one-room-house in the beginning.

Love is not love if it is not expressed.

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